Better Living Through Subtraction
Man, I don’t know if it the time of year, the decision to go non-traditional for the Thanksgiving Day meal, or just a teensy-tiny hangover, but Social Media seems…nuttier than ever.
First of all, if a commenter doesn’t know the difference between “traitor” and “trader” I’m skeptical of their grasp of Sedition, Treason, or the subtleties of the UCMJ.
That’s not to say I’m in any way educated, beyond a little casual reading and a 45-minute conversation with a retired Marine Corps Major. But I grasp that Senator Kelly may be in for an embarrassing spectacle and a minor cut in his retirement pay…if the powers that be insist on pushing past the Mean Girls on Twitter shtick.
That’s the bigger issue, in my opinion: We’re now watching politicians from both parties using Social Media Mob Hysteria as both justification for dismissing the Loyal Opposition and a call for a still mostly reflexive choir of Public Opinion.
But…I moderate two reasonably busy accounts and I’m 100% sure a significant portion of the recent traffic has been bots and sockpuppets. They’ve been mostly unsuccessful in fomenting anger, but a few folks take the bait every day.
An ugly trend is, I think, a hint as to the effectiveness of these campaigns: More profanity. I’ve never seen so many comments jump straight to calling women every misogynistic word in the book. The Poop emojis and variations of spelling Fuck and Shit to try and circumvent the profanity filters. And all the almost-not-quite racial epithets…pathetic in any light, but now an effort to rage-bait when the actual argument isn’t getting engagement.
It's really important to remember that is what the scum needs: Engagement. It does NOT matter if you’re angry or sad or smart or silly…when you reply to these accounts you’re telling the algorithms that determine priority for elevating posts and accounts that the scum gets clicks…which causes the platforms to prioritize the scum.
There’s actually a whole theory about this (and its offline manifestations) called ‘Enshittification’ and why it’s a sign it may be time to simply walk away from platforms that do business this way. Corey Doctorow even wrote a book on the subject…
But I think, at least in the context of social media, you can employ some of the oldest advice the internet has to offer: Don’t Feed The Trolls.
Someday that’s going to be carved onto my headstone. And even then, nobody is going to listen.
Damnit.
I just received a text from Slatic: A friend of his, a West Point graduate, agrees that Kelly is prosecutable under UCMJ. He makes a great argument for inference as incitement in the vein of undermining Good Order. I have no doubt he’s correct.
Will prosecuting Mark Kelly turn one single Blue vote Red? Because Kelly isn’t going to miss a meal or sell his house if he’s busted down a rank or three. They could yank his entire Navy pension (which is almost definitely outside the bounds of the administrative penalties available to the Navy/DOD via UCMJ) and it wouldn’t change the man’s life in any recognizable way.
Instead, Red voters will call him despicable and swear they’re never voting for him. And Blue voters will be giving him more attention and donations than even after his wife was shot.
The whole thing is drama for drama’s sake: The original video, the GOP’s mirror-world copycat video, and the DOD statement on Twitter.
None of this improves the economy.
None of this makes healthcare affordable.
None of this secures the border.
None of this feeds hungry kids.
None of this jails a criminal.
None of this builds houses.
None of this leads an addict to sobriety.
None of this matters.
It’s silly bullshit that lets us fight about personalities and abstract principles. Nobody outside the JAG Corps has any idea how this could actually play out, and even in that realm I see differences of opinion.
This, too, is a kind of Enshittification. Swamp Creatures and Grifters are living high on your tax dollars, and using irrelevant squabbles to keep you amused while they continue to pick your pocket and rob your children.
And maybe…just maybe…Mark Kelly and Friends will get some empty-headed enlisted kid into hot water for making them think they can play Latrine Lawyer when they have a personal objection to an order their Facebook Friends think is stupid/bad/wrong.
I probably would have been that guy. I love a good argument. Not a big fan of jail food, though. And I don’t imagine military incarceration is any kind of upgrade from County Jail. I’ve been yelled at, fired, and even threatened with physical violence by people I’ve worked for, but none of them had the power to send me off to the stockade!
Now, if you’ve stuck with me though 803 words, you may be wondering: Is there a bigger point here?
Yes and No.
We’re being abused by the elites. A self-anointed ruling class and the ultra-wealthy have teamed up to use our own poor self-control to suck the last wealth out of the working class. And we’re on Facebook trying to reason with an Eastern European bot farm about basic human decency and actual merit while Zuckerberg pleasures himself to the ad revenue generated by a bunch of jabbering…
Yup. Two more days of Thanksgiving Weekend and I think I’m going to go enjoy a cigar and forget all about it!
Love you guys. Stay Weird.